Dealing with heartbreak

I want this to be the last few times we use this term and then it is banned in my eyes. Where we use the bandage heart emoji instead.
BUT because I have a possible spouse (fear of it being turned down but also no pressure), my lovers the RBs, I am dealing with heartbreak.
I don’t mean by the negative words of the heartbreak song, I just want to acknowledge the fact that yes that is how I feel. How you must feel. Because we’re lovers. Because I’ve had to “dismiss” you from force, from people not allowing me to have my own world, or understanding that I wanted to be more exclusive to everyone, verified or not. You see? Because whilst they are VIPs, they are still people. I want them to be able to have breaks here in this community. Banned or not, you’re all still welcome. Because my site becomes a neutral zone.

I am preparing to do my duties, to wear my notable HRH brooches, ready for my arrivals on my blue sash that I will wear over my Royal blue dress for the arrival of my presence when I get to the celebrity world. Would you let me in? Would you shut me out? Would my dreams and success be crushed? No one knows what to expect right not Im sure. But you see. You have yourselves a leader of the Content Creation world.

I want to see everything. The goods and the bads, even if that means scaring me a few times.
Don’t change your routines to “seem normal” when I do arrive, I want to take it as it is.
Don’t panic when I do arrive, because whilst I will be fierce, I am only protecting myself, all of you and ESPECIALLY JO & my lovers, the RBs.
They have my heart, all 10 of them. And I’d like to think that I have theirs.

I know it was not good to have “dismissed” you. But see it from my position as to why I did that. And this is a promise. No matter how tough, how good times get, I will NEVER do it again and I will fight it.

I don’t want us to be parasocial. I want us to be a real group. I want us to be able to set a good example in how boundaries should be perceived.
To warn people, regardless on allowing people to “shit” (i mean not physically, ew) on us, that we are done with that shit and we want no more. From that line of Jessie (hello cast), where they say “And she’s bringing her friends” with it resulting in a scream. Ha, yes! BUT also no. We are and should not be perceived as threats. The light to this world.

My apologies if I spoke out of place, I freaked out, I got the wrong messages from it, because of automod, because of babe being blocked? Why? Is it because you want it private? I get that.

I am using this site to provide resources, in the hopes that I really can make a difference with my fame.
I am going to practise a few things.
Interactions meeting other stars.
Interactions meeting evil stars &
Interactions on meeting the press. The real press. NOT like the fake one I had deal-ed with, because I WAS NOT famous now. Now I have secured a notable searching point to my fame. This is a start. So, unless I become viral more than one occasion, again ty, please continue as I will need to practise. Don’t be surprise if I take a few notable things myself like a picture or two to say look my first press!

Hopefully if things go well financially, I may even be able to come off government help (but this is how I am cared for atm) and whilst I am not in it for the money, I am sure I will be able to see and learn the ways of how Content Creation can be earned. Especially being Empress. My rule though is that if you’re going to support me financially, make sure you have taken care of yourself first.

It would appear that I am also blocked on my backup discord, but not my spiritual server. Why? Is it because of the success? Who said you could “manage” my successes?

When playing the heartbroken song I did feel a lot of energies come online? Why? Were you all worried for my heartbreak, could you feel and hear the cries I have often? Or are you spiteful and laughing deep down about it? This is and shouldn’t be a joke.

This is a big thing though, loving hearts. Especially my RBs who I may have wounded as of I to them.
Let us have our private moments, pls, I will try my best to express in a status or two, because I am trying to allow communication through this parasocial and block.

I want to unstuck you all , I want to return the favors of motivation, inspiration and hope, in the hopes we won’t all become hopeless. I did that stream appeal because I wanted to share what we are going through is NOT a joke, it is real. It is really happening and will explain why I am inbetween worlds for the most part.

These blogs are also useful information for you all that want to support also. And whilst I won’t follow every celebrity because of my account limits and because I want to keep it niche, I will still support you all by producing my many PDFs, my many blogs even. So this is your home. Welcome home, we will be here and support you and this family as much as possible. Especially as I want to help the world! Love is the answer. But hearts should not be toyed. This can lead to dangerous heart break and worse, death by heartbreak as I fear that that might be my cause of death one day. Do you want that to happen? No? Good. Yes? Why?

So I am sorry for any wounds. I’d like to patch them up with you all individually and together. Providing it doesn’t change of the fact that I may have found a spouse. Most notable RBs do follow them on IG. Why? To support them? I hope so.

Don’t f them about. Or me for that matter. Im a friend, an ally, I’d like to consider you all, my RBs as my lovers. My deepest treasures. Which is why I do live on the nerve of being protective of you all. Pls return it. It shows we love each other. But pls, love me harder, like I do to you. Always and that will not change now, for the good, now that I do have a good supporting and trying to understand network. ILY you all, don’t forget that. Also if it is possible I have found a spouse, pls don’t feel I think of you any less. Remember I am also finding my people, lovers and friends within the most powerful source of all, and that is Content Creation. But you have my heart. Treat it carefully as I would to yours and I want us to start healing our wounds. As long as it takes. Anything to fix it. Shine the light, my little lights. I love you. *emotionally collapses*